QUOTE OF THE DAY: "If it's very painful for you to criticize your friends, you're safe in doing it. But if you take the slightest pleasure in it, that's the time to hold your tongue." Alice Duer Miller

TODAY IS: NAT'L. LEMON MERINGUE PIE DAY + FEAST OF THE ASSUMPTION DAY + CHAUVIN DAY + NAT'L. RELAXATION DAY + ANNIVERSARY OF WOODSTOCK + ANNIVERSARY OF THE PANAMA CANAL! AND TODAY BEGINS NAT'L. AVIATION WEEK!

CELEB/FAMOUS B-DAYS: JULIA CHILD + JOE JONAS + BEN AFFLECK + LINDA ELLERBEE + MIKE CONNORS + NAPOLEON BONAPARTE + DEBRA MESSING + DEBI MAZAR + TESS HARPER

NEW STUFF AT A GLANCE:
Hell's Kitchen, MasterChef, Bachelor Pad, Kate Plus 8, Surprise Homecoming, The Best Thing I Ever Ate, Giuliana & Bill, Tia & Tamera, Hoarders, Intervention, Deadly Sibling Rivalry (movie), The Protector, The Closer, Rizzoli & Isles, Teen Wolf (finale), Basketball Wives Reunion, Single Ladies, Pawn Stars (x2), 1000 Ways to Die, Secret Life of the American Teenager, The Lying Game (premiere), Millionaire Matchmaker (premiere), Most Eligible Dallas (premiere), Eureka, Warehouse 13, Alphas, Adventure Time w/Finn & Jake, House Hunters, House Hunters Int'l., HGTV Design Star, Dina's Party (premiere), House Hunters on Vacation, Deadly 60 (x2), Behind Mansion Walls, James May Drinks to Britain, Bad Girls Club, Hair Battle Spectacular (premiere), Top 50 Videos of the '90s, RuPaul's Drag U, The A-List: NY, 1 Girl 5 Gays, UnSung, All Worked Up, Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations, Weeds, The Big C


NEW SPORTS STUFF:MLBaseball: Giants/Braves + Yankees/Royals + Mets/Padres, Monday Night Football Exhibition: Jets/Texans, WWE Monday Night Raw


*CBS has repeats of How I Met Your Mother, Two & a Half Men, Mike & Molly and Hawaii Five-0

*NBC has repeats of America's Got Talent and Harry's Law

*FOX is NEW with Hell's Kitchen and MasterChef

*ABC is NEW with Bachelor Pad and has a repeat of Castle

*WWOR is NEW with Monday Night Football Exhibition: Jets/Texans

*CW has repeats of Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill and Seinfeld

*PBS has repeats

*TVGN has Circle of Friends

*TLC is NEW with Kate Plus 8 and Surprise Homecoming

*Food Ntwrk is NEW with The Best Thing I Ever Ate (Street Food)

*Style is NEW with Giuliana & Bill and Tia & Tamera

*A&E is NEW with Hoarders and Intervention

*Lifetime TV is NEW with Deadly Sibling Rivalry (movie) and The Protector

*USA is NEW with WWE Monday Night Raw

*TNT is NEW with The Closer and Rizzoli & Isles

*FX has Armageddon

*Disney has Wizards of Waverly Place: The Movie

*MTV is NEW with the 1st season finale of Teen Wolf

*VH1 is NEW with Basketball Wives Reunion and Single Ladies

*History is NEW with Pawn Stars (x2)

*Spike is NEW with 1000 Ways to Die

*E! is NEW with Chelsea Lately (Elizabeth Banks)

*ABCFam is NEW with Secret Life of the American Teenager and the series premiere of The Lying Game

*Bravo is NEW with the 5th season premiere of Millionaire Matchmaker and the series premiere of Most Eligible Dallas

*Syfy is NEW with Eureka, Warehouse 13 and Alphas

*Bravo has Hot Boyz and Streetballers

*Cartoon Ntwrk is NEW with Adventure Time w/Finn & Jake

*ESPN is NEW with Monday Night Football Exhibition: Jets/Texans

*ESPN2 is NEW with MLBaseball: Giants/Braves

*YES is NEW with MLBaseball: Yankees/Royals

*HGTV is NEW with House Hunters, House Hunters Int'l., HGTV Design Star, the series premiere of Dina's Party (Dina Manzo) and House Hunters on Vacation

*AMC has Goodfellas

*SNY is NEW with MLBaseball: Mets/Padres

*NatGeoWild is NEW with Deadly 60 (x2)

*ID is NEW with Behind Mansion Walls

*BBC is NEW with James May Drinks to Britain

*WE has reruns of Golden Girls

*Lifetime Movies has All the Good Ones Are Married and Waitress

*Oxygen is NEW with Bad Girls Club and the 2nd season premiere of Hair Battle Spectacular

*Hallmark has reruns of Frasier

*CMT has Freaky Friday

*GAC is NEW with Top 50 Videos of the '90s (Pt. 1 of 5)

*Encore has Surrogates, Passenger 57 and All About the Benjamins

*Reelz has City Slickers and Tin Cup

*G4 has Commando

*Logo is NEW with RuPaul's Drag U, The A-List: New York and 1 Girl 5 Gays

*IFC has Ginger Snaps and Lake Placid

*Indie has Flashbacks of a Fool, The Funeral and The End of Violence

*Retro has Four for Texas

*TCM has The Hunchback of Notre Dame and The Phantom of the Opera (1925)

*Flix has Father of the Bride and A Simple Twist of Fate

*TVOne is NEW with UnSung (Mary Wells)

*truTV is NEW with All Worked Up

*Travel is NEW with Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (Ukraine)

*GMC has The Pelican Brief

*HBO has Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, Gloria: In Her Own Words and The Town

*Showtime has The Ghost Writer and is NEW with Weeds and The Big C

*Starz has The Karate Kid, Death at a Funeral and Law Abiding Citizen

*Late Nite Highlites: Harrison Ford on Late Show w/David Letterman (repeat); Betty White and Patton Oswalt on The Late Late Show w/Craig Ferguson (repeat); Shaun White and Olivia Wilde on The Tonight Show w/Jay Leno (repeat); Mila Kunis and Joshua Topolsky on Late Night w/Jimmy Fallon (repeat); Betty White and Robert Rodriguez on Jimmy Kimmel Live! (NEW); Kathy Griffin and Christopher Mintz-Plasse on Conan (NEW)

(http://www.tvguide.com/)